Could an Unarmed Human Beat a Rabid Goose?

Imagine that you are taking a walk in the park. You stop on the path to let a small flock of geese cross in front of you. All but one makes it across. The last one stops short of the crossing and starts seething at you. Before you can react, the goose is charging! Only one question runs through your mind: Can an unarmed human beat a rabid goose in a fight?

While birds like geese and ducks are not susceptible to rabies, here we will examine the hypothetical scenario of unarmed human vs. rabid goose, specifically, a goose that is bent on being the first waterfowl to directly kill an adult person! We’’ll be using the stats of the average person and those of a common Canada goose.

Right center frame, a Canada Goose, standing in wate, flapping its wings which are deep medium gray and large. The bird's body is lighter gray-to-whit. It has a long black neck, a black head, and a white throat. Indistince natural background odf green and gold. — Who would win a fight between a human and a rabid goose?
©Erni/Shutterstock.com

Comparing an Unarmed Human and a Rabid Goose

	Unarmed Human	Rabid Goose
Size	Weight: 130- 199 pounds on average Height: 5 feet 3 inches to feet 9 inches tall	Weight: 7-14 pounds Length: 30-43 inches Wingspan: 4-6.1 feet
Speed	-The fastest human ever ran 27.5 mph during a sprint -The average person runs 6-8 mph	-Can fly at 40 mph on average, up to 70 mph -Can only run about 1 mph more or less
Defenses	– Humans are rather fragile creatures with thin skin and few defensive adaptations – Superior intellect allows humans to develop armor, detection methods, and protection methods – Humans recognize patterns that indicate danger, especially the behavior of other animals – Good visual and auditory senses allow humans to spot predators	– Can fly away from trouble on the ground – Have light bodies and little to protect them from blunt or sharp attacks
Offensive Capabilities	– Humans have relatively low strength, even the fittest people are only able to lift their body weight with their arms – Can use punches, kicks, chokes, and grappling to attack foes – Can bite, but human teeth are small, short, and not necessarily sharp – Humans have a bite power of 120 to 160 PSI	– Can strike with their wings – Have sharp serrated edges in their beak called tomia – Rarely bite, but they still can deliver a bite – May scratch with sharp nails on their feet
Predatory Behavior	– Can act as an ambush or cursorial predator	– No predatory instincts – Primarily herbivorous – Eats insects, but they don’t hunt like other omnivorous beings

What Are the Key Factors in a Fight Between an Unarmed Human and a Rabid Goose?

Determining whether an unarmed human would defeat a rabid goose in a fight requires examining several factors. In terms of this battle, only a few elements really matter. Size, offensive power, and predatory behaviors are some of the most important factors in this battle because any one of them could swing the momentum of the fight in favor of one of the contestants.

Of course, we want to provide a well-rounded overview of this battle, so we’ll explore other aspects of the battle as well. After we’ve explored each part and assigned advantages to the human or rabid goose, we’ll break down the fight in detail!

Unarmed Human vs Rabid Goose: Size

An unarmed human has a significant size advantage over a rabid goose. The average human stands between 5 feet 3 inches tall and 5 feet 9 inches tall, and they weigh from 130 pounds to 199 pounds. Humans can get much larger than these measures, though.

Meanwhile, the average rabid goose will weigh between 7 and 14 pounds, stands less than 2 feet tall, and has a wingspan that can measure between 4 and 6.1 feet.

A Canada goose, lower right frame eating out of a human hnd. The hand is light skinned with a long dark sleeve covering the arm. The goose has a grey body, black long neck and head and a white throat. indistinct grey background. — The average human is larger than a Canada goose.
©Alexander Oganezov/Shutterstock.com

Humans would have the advantage in this aspect of the fight.

Unarmed Human vs Rabid Goose: Speed

Neither humans nor rabid geese have impressive speed on the ground. The average person walks at about 2 to 3 mph and runs at 6.5 to 8 mph. Canada geese only move at speeds of about 1 mph on the ground, but they can fly at 40 mph or higher when migrating.

Geese have the speed advantage in this fight if they attack from the air, but humans have the advantage on the ground where most of the fight would take place.

Center frame: Canada Goose flying over water,. The goose's wings are large and spread. The goose is flying low, so low that its wing its almost in the slate blue water. The goose is grey and brown with a long pblack neck, and black head, with a white throat. Out-of-focus natural outdoor background. — Geese have the advantage in a fight with a human if they attack from the air.
©Krasula/Shutterstock.com

Unarmed Human vs Rabid Goose: Defenses

Both humans and geese are rather fragile creatures in terms of physical defenses. Humans have several weak spots that they have bolstered through the use of tools and technology, and by passing knowledge down through generations. People can use their intelligence to find safety or make use of their visual and auditory senses to spot danger

olive skinned, female appearing human right frame with their right hand up to their right ear as if to listen more closely. their is pierced and a hoop earring is visible.vThe right ear/temple relaxer (arm) of a pair of spectacles (glasses) is visible. It is faux tortoise shell the human's hair is long, dark brown and straight, tucked behind the ear. Grey background. — Humans can use their visual and auditory senses to spot danger.
©pathdoc/Shutterstock.com

Geese can get away from trouble by flying, but their light bodies don’t help them much in a fight against a true predator.

Human would have the advantage here.

Unarmed Human vs Rabid Goose: Offensive Capabilities

Unarmed humans don’t have much going for them in terms of offensive power, but they’re not completely helpless. For example, a fit person can lift their bodyweight with their arms and exert even more force with their legs. Humans can grapple, punch, kick, and use their weight to attack and overcome other animals.

Center frame, facing camera, a dark skinned very lean, muscular male wearing black shorts, a grey sleeveless shirt, white socks and yellow shoes, is bent toward the camera with his hands on a silver metal bar with two large round yellow weights at each end. He is preparing to lift the weight. He is focused on the bar. He is in a gym/ weight room. — A fit person can lift their bodyweight with their arms.
©Alfredo Lopez/Shutterstock.com

Geese have very few offensive capabilities. They have short nails on their feet that they might employ to scratch a human. They could also swat a person with their wings. But their most effective offense would be using the serrated edges of their beak, called tomia, to bite or peck at the human.

All in all, unarmed humans would have the offensive advantage compared to a rabid goose.

Unarmed Human vs Rabid Goose: Predatory Behavior

Humans are some of the best predators on the planet due to their keen intelligence and ingenuity. They can ambush prey or wear it down before killing it. Without weapons or tools, though, humans would have to rely on an ambush to get the drop on their prey.

Even though geese don’t have any predatory instincts, geese will attack in self-defense. Moreover, a rabid goose, if one existed, would be more than willing to engage a person in a fight.

Humans have better predatory instincts, but they are hampered due to the absence of tools or weapons in this battle.

Frame Right, movement toward frame left; A Canada goose on water with its wings splayed out and its mouth opened. The goose is mostly grey with a long black neck, black head, and white throat — Geese will attack in self-defense.
©Steve Ikeguchi/Shutterstock.com

Who Would Win in a Fight Between an Unarmed Human and a Rabid Goose?

An unarmed human would win a fight against a rabid goose. Simply put, the human is too large for the goose to overcome. Even if the goose were rabid, the human could still overcome the small but vicious creature in a fight.

It might not be a pretty sight, but the human would emerge victorious!

Up Next:

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Sources

cdc.gov / Accessed November 27, 2022
pubmed.ncbi.nih.gov / Accessed November 27, 2022
ncbi.nih.gov / Accessed November 27, 2022

About the Author

Kyle Glatz

Kyle Glatz is a writer at A-Z-Animals where his primary focus is on geography and mammals. Kyle has been writing for researching and writing about animals and numerous other topics for 10 years, and he holds a Bachelor's Degree in English and Education from Rowan University. A resident of New Jersey, Kyle enjoys reading, writing, and playing video games.

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